Patricia Martin | What Happens When Your Online Persona Takes Over
The Experiment: The B-sides Will Explore New Territory in Jungian Thought
Sometimes the best discoveries come from saying “yes” to an experiment.
Five years ago, during the COVID shutdown, I took a leap: launching a podcast with the C. G. Jung Institute of Chicago. After devoting two years immersed in Jung’s work as a student in the Institute’s Jungian Studies Program, and subsequently leading a Collected Works reading group, I’d joined the Institute’s public program committee just as we faced an urgent question—how do we stay connected when we can’t gather in person?
A podcast felt right. And I was itching to explore new directions during the torpor of the shutdown. What started as an experiment has grown into something beyond what I imagined—a global audience and conversations with leading voices in psychology who generously share their insights with our listeners.
When Restlessness Becomes a Compass
This summer, I felt a familiar stirring again. I’ve learned to trust these moments. They’re rarely about boredom—they’re usually invitations to evolve, to stretch into something new.
That’s how the “B-sides” series was born. Think of it as going off-road on the path to individuation—intimate conversations about what it actually feels like to navigate digital life, wrestle with uncertainty, and maintain the connection to our inner realm.
The Hidden Cost of Online Influence
For our first episode, I sat down with Hilde Helphenstein, an artist and art world critic whose own experiment as an online influencer spiraled into something she never saw coming.
Hilde created Jerry Gagosian—an online persona supposedly related to Larry Gagosian, the legendary NY gallery owner and kingmaker of the contemporary art world. Her feeds drew thousands of followers. At prestigious live events, such as Art Basel and the Whitney Biennial, people approached her as “Jerry” and she’d correct them, explaining Jerry was just an online identity.
People waved that away. The persona stuck.
What began as a cheeky experiment became her identity in the world. And as Hilde surrendered to living as someone else, emotional consequences followed—ultimately reaching a breaking point that forced her to make a choice: keep performing or reclaim her true self.
A Case Study for Our Persona-driven Age
Hilde’s conversation is unflinching. She walks us through her undoing with remarkable honesty delivering a poignant portrait of influencer culture from the inside, and a cautionary tale for an era when who we are online is not necessarily who we actually are.
You may recall the classic New Yorker cartoon. A dog sits at the computer with the caption: “On the internet, nobody knows you’re a dog.” It used to be funny. Hilde’s story shows us why it’s no laughing matter anymore—and what it cost her to claw her way back to herself.
Listen In
The conversation is in two parts—a before-and-after portrait of one woman’s struggle with digital identity, followed by her journey back to herself.
The collective is living through a metamorphosis few consented to. The question isn’t whether our digital personas will change us—they already have. The pressing question is whether we’ll become conscious of the consequences in time to choose what we’re becoming, or whether we’ll arrive at ourselves as strangers.
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